Koko:
Owlo, today was the worst day ever. I am so upset right now.
Owlo:
Oh my. Come sit with me, Koko. Tell me what happened.
Koko:
So at lunch, me and Benny both finished our veggie soup at the same time. But Mrs. Fern only gave the last cookie to Benny. It was so unfair!
Owlo:
That does sound really frustrating. I can understand why you feel upset.
Koko:
I wanted to yell, but I just sat there feeling all hot and grumpy inside. My ears were flat the whole afternoon.
Owlo:
You know what, Koko? That feeling you described, that hot and grumpy feeling, has a name. It is called frustration.
Koko:
Frustration? That is a funny word for such a terrible feeling.
Owlo:
It is the feeling we get when something seems unfair or does not go the way we hoped. Everyone feels it, even me.
Koko:
Even you, Owlo? You always seem so calm about everything.
Owlo:
Oh, I have had my share of frustrating moments. Just last week, I spent all morning preparing a science experiment, and then the equipment broke before we could even start.
Koko:
What did you do? Did you just give up and go home?
Owlo:
I wanted to, for a moment. But I took a slow, deep breath first. Then I asked myself a very important question.
Koko:
What question?
Owlo:
I asked myself, can I change this situation, or is it out of my hands?
Koko:
Hmm. So, could you change the broken equipment?
Owlo:
Not right away. So I decided to use that time to read instead. The frustration was still there, but I did not let it ruin my whole day.
Koko:
I think the cookie situation was out of my hands too. Mrs. Fern already gave it to Benny.
Owlo:
Exactly. And here is something important to understand. Feeling frustrated is completely okay. It is what we do with that feeling that matters.
Koko:
What do you mean, what we do with it?
Owlo:
Well, let me show you something. Come with me to the art room for a moment.
Owlo:
Here we are. Now, Koko, I want you to take this piece of paper and this pencil.
Koko:
Okay. What am I drawing?
Owlo:
Draw what the frustration felt like inside you at lunch today. Do not think too much. Just draw.
Koko:
Okay. It kind of looks like a big storm cloud with spiky edges. And maybe some lightning bolts.
Owlo:
That is a wonderful drawing. Now, on the other side of the paper, draw what you wish had happened instead.
Koko:
I drew two cookies, one for me and one for Benny. And we are both smiling.
Owlo:
That is perfect, Koko. You just did something very smart without even realizing it.
Koko:
I did? It just felt like drawing.
Owlo:
You named your feeling, you let it out safely, and then you imagined a fair solution. Those are three powerful steps for coping with unfairness.
Koko:
Coping. That means dealing with something hard, right?
Owlo:
Exactly right. Coping means finding a healthy way to handle a difficult feeling, instead of letting it take over.
Koko:
So next time something unfair happens, I can draw, or breathe, or ask if I can change it?
Owlo:
Yes. And there is one more thing you can do. You can talk to someone you trust, like a parent, or a friend, or me.
Koko:
Talking actually helped today. I feel way less stormy inside now.
Owlo:
That is the power of it. Feelings are like clouds, Koko. They look huge and scary, but they always pass.
Koko:
Okay, so here is what I learned today. When something unfair happens, I will probably feel frustrated, and that is totally normal. I can take a deep breath, ask if I can change the situation, let my feelings out in a safe way like drawing, and talk to someone I trust. Oh, and feelings are like clouds. They do not stay forever, even the really stormy ones. Next time, I want to learn about what to do when a friend is the one being unfair, because that feels even trickier.